Who Are We Becoming? Identity, AI, and the Search for Inner Wisdom

Who are you?

Over the past six months, I’ve noticed a growing trend in my sessions: people saying, “I asked GPT about…” People are increasingly turning to AI tools to solve their relationship issues or navigate psychological roadblocks. As a psychologist, I see this as both a helpful and potentially harmful shift, depending on how these tools are used.

In my view, AI is like a version of the collective unconscious: a vast reservoir of information that can be accessed instantly, without much effort. It’s convenient, resourceful, and often helpful when looking for quick solutions. But there’s a risk when we use AI as a second brain. Our minds are wired to solve problems through a complex interplay between different brain regions. For example, when faced with a challenge, our neural network typically travels from the amygdala, our emotional centre and then to the prefrontal cortex, which governs executive functioning and helps us with our decision making. This journey is essential for developing insight and resilience.

But if we bypass that process and continually reach for quick fixes, we risk weakening our capacity to reflect, process, and think critically. If we stop exercising those mental muscles, what happens to us as human beings?

I’m not anti-technology. I value the many ways AI has improved access to information and resources. But I also remember my childhood vividly: walking to the library, heading to the autobiography section, browsing the shelves. Often, I’d stumble upon an unexpected title, something I wasn’t looking for, but ended up needing. The very act of searching, of not finding what I thought I wanted, often led me to something more valuable.

Had I gone straight to the librarian and asked for a specific book, I would’ve found it faster. I could have completed my homework more efficiently. But I might never have discovered the book that changed how I saw the world, such as the story of Waris Desrie, who fled Somalia and suffered from female genital mutilation. I learned from her strength, resilience and how the desire to live a better life transformed her pain into post-traumatic growth. I was a teenager when I read this book, and it profoundly impacted how I viewed my role in society.

It’s those unexpected discoveries, those serendipitous encounters, that AI can’t replicate. The experience of not knowing, feeling lost in thought, and stumbling across something meaningful by chance is deeply human. These experiences help us grow and shape our identity.

AI can certainly help us find answers quickly. It can even save us time and money by performing tasks traditionally done by humans. And in some areas, it surpasses us, particularly in its ability to store and retrieve vast amounts of information. But AI can’t replicate what happens when your mind, body, and heart work together to arrive at an intuitive answer, an answer only your soul can uncover.

I believe humans and AI can complement one another. The key is knowing when to rely on which. If we overuse technology to find solutions to every problem, we risk missing the deeper journey of discovery that comes through introspection, uncertainty, and genuine human connection.

Our identity develops through lived experience, through confusion, discomfort, curiosity, and reflection. When you’re faced with a question or a dilemma, pause. Let yourself sit with the feeling of “I don’t know.” Before reaching for AI, ask: “Is there any way I can figure this out on my own?” And if the answer is no, then ask: “What tools, human or technological, can help me explore this further?”

Sometimes, AI can be one of those tools. Other times, turning to another person, a friend, a therapist, or a mentor can help you untangle your thoughts and move forward.

As a psychologist, I don’t see myself as the type of librarian who simply hands you the book you came in for. Instead, I see my role as someone who will go one step further and walk you to the autobiography section. We pick out a few titles together, read the summaries, and you decide which one resonates. Then you read the book aloud, your story, in your own words, and I listen, respond and offer insights that can activate a new narrative you may not have been able to access.

Now and then, I might ask you to pause. I might say, “What do you think of that part?” or “Do you want to keep reading this one or explore another?” Through this process, your understanding of your own identity deepens. You begin to see how your experiences, relationships, and the people who shaped you have all contributed to who you are today.

While supporting humans in navigating the dynamic interplay between rapid technological advancement and the uncertainty it brings, my role is to help you navigate the intimate narrative of your life story. I believe therapists help people stay grounded in their inner wisdom, fostering self-reflection, curiosity, and emotional resilience so that they can explore meaningful insight in a rapidly changing world.

By Tunteeya Yamaoka